Imponderable Questions

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Maybe I stole this from this site , but here goes:

Imponderable Questions

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Do fish get cramps after eating?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?
Doesn't 'expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
How do I set my laser printer on stun?
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
How does Teflon stick to the pan?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?
If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him - Is he still wrong?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
If God dropped acid, would he see people?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
If most car accidents occur within five miles of home, why doesn't everyone just move 10 miles away?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of the stuff?
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
If you jogged backward . . .would you gain weight?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
If you're born again, do you have two bellybuttons?
Is a castrated pig disgruntled?
Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Is there another word for synonym?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
What happens when none of your bees wax?
What's the speed of dark?
When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!!
When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
 
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