This is a book of short stories that I found in a pile of books brought over from my parents house that I have had for almost two years. I so enjoyed one of these short stories that I decided to try to share at least part of it.
The title of this story is AUTUMN, WE HAERDLY KNEW YE. It seems that a radio personality in the late '90s claimed that the dog days of summer was over and autumn was here. Mr. Flemmons took exception to that remark and claimed Texas did not have autumn, but just a very short fall.
"...Because Texas is so large, fall has geographical implications. Down in the Rio Grande Valley, fall is known affectionately as "El Whew," and citizens celebrate by running through the streets yelling "Whew! Whew!" at one another because the heat index plunges into the low three figures. Sometimes people are so giddy with the arrival of fall that they commit folk dancing. At the same time, up in the Panhndle,...fall, most years, lasts comepletely through the lunch hour, and people miss it entirely if they linger over dessert.
The radio guy will learn that Texas, an over-achiever in all ways, doesn't limit itself to a skimpy four-season year. Beginning with after-Christmas white sales, the Texas seasons are: Intermittent Northers, Bluebonnets, Hay Fever, Tornado (alternately called "Hail") Hot, Real Hot, Most Hot, My-Gawd-the-Heat, Football and Fall. Now and then, we throw in a Drought season to break the monotony.
...Finally inertia and PTA Halloween carnivals bring summer's heat down to a tolerable level just about the time high school football teams begin their all-important district game schedules--powerhouses like the Trent Gorillas take on the Blackwell Hornets. The purest evidence of fall's arrival in Texas is Odessa's Mojo being tested against the Midland Lee Rebels, Stephenville battling Brownnwood, the Kangaroos of Killeen vs the 'Dogs of Copperas Cove. Fall's here when everywhere, all at once, people stand up and shout in unison: "On to State!" and there's a crisp, tangy aroma of a concession stand Frito Pie in the air.
Frito Pie is our fall food and Texas' salute to Vermont's autumn because it contains all of New England's fall foliage tones--the brown of Fritos, the mahogany shades of good rich chili, the white of finely chopped onion, the glossy yellow of shredded cheese--it's an opulent palette of nature's colors.
There's a large home (and school lunch) version of Frito Pie--an oven casserole-- but it is best eaten at a Friday night high school football game concession stand, made by a PTA mom or one of the Spirit Club teenagers. ....."
The title of this story is AUTUMN, WE HAERDLY KNEW YE. It seems that a radio personality in the late '90s claimed that the dog days of summer was over and autumn was here. Mr. Flemmons took exception to that remark and claimed Texas did not have autumn, but just a very short fall.
"...Because Texas is so large, fall has geographical implications. Down in the Rio Grande Valley, fall is known affectionately as "El Whew," and citizens celebrate by running through the streets yelling "Whew! Whew!" at one another because the heat index plunges into the low three figures. Sometimes people are so giddy with the arrival of fall that they commit folk dancing. At the same time, up in the Panhndle,...fall, most years, lasts comepletely through the lunch hour, and people miss it entirely if they linger over dessert.
The radio guy will learn that Texas, an over-achiever in all ways, doesn't limit itself to a skimpy four-season year. Beginning with after-Christmas white sales, the Texas seasons are: Intermittent Northers, Bluebonnets, Hay Fever, Tornado (alternately called "Hail") Hot, Real Hot, Most Hot, My-Gawd-the-Heat, Football and Fall. Now and then, we throw in a Drought season to break the monotony.
...Finally inertia and PTA Halloween carnivals bring summer's heat down to a tolerable level just about the time high school football teams begin their all-important district game schedules--powerhouses like the Trent Gorillas take on the Blackwell Hornets. The purest evidence of fall's arrival in Texas is Odessa's Mojo being tested against the Midland Lee Rebels, Stephenville battling Brownnwood, the Kangaroos of Killeen vs the 'Dogs of Copperas Cove. Fall's here when everywhere, all at once, people stand up and shout in unison: "On to State!" and there's a crisp, tangy aroma of a concession stand Frito Pie in the air.
Frito Pie is our fall food and Texas' salute to Vermont's autumn because it contains all of New England's fall foliage tones--the brown of Fritos, the mahogany shades of good rich chili, the white of finely chopped onion, the glossy yellow of shredded cheese--it's an opulent palette of nature's colors.
There's a large home (and school lunch) version of Frito Pie--an oven casserole-- but it is best eaten at a Friday night high school football game concession stand, made by a PTA mom or one of the Spirit Club teenagers. ....."
