BP Oil Jokes

"BP CEO Tony Hayward said recently, 'No one wants this thing over more than I do. I'd like my life back.' Tony, I'm so sorry you had your summer disrupted. I'd buy you a drink, but you'd probably spill that too ... and make me clean it up." —Craig Ferguson
 
"Here's a little bit of good news. The Coast Guard says that BP is now catching up to 630,000 gallons of oil a day. The bad news is that they're absorbing it with live duck down." —Jimmy Fallon
 
Heard this report today:

British Petroleum announced today that they will no longer hire Cajuns to help in the cleanup. Thiobodeaux, Boudreaux and Fontenot were told to clean as many brown pelicans as they could....

So far, Thibodeaux has cleaned and gutted over 56 birds while Boudreaux made the roux and Fontenot cooked the rice
 
Good one Lifegatesports. Back in 1995 I was working in Lake Charles LA at Northup-Grummen and was introduced to the Thiobodeaux and Boudreaux jokes along with Lousinanna Boudian amoung other delectable treats.
 
@BPGlobalPR has attracted more than 36,000 Twitter followers but, they’re not the real BP.
The fake account was set up on May 19 and states via their bio that ‘this page exists to get BP’s message and mission statement out into the twitterverse!’.
Tweets from the fake account include:
We feel terrible about spilling oil in American waters, we’ll make sure the next spill happens where the terrorists live
The ocean looks just a bit slimmer today. Dressing it in black really did the trick!
The good news: Mermaids are real. The bad news: They are now extinct
 
SavannahSixManFan":3vkza6er said:
Good one Lifegatesports. Back in 1995 I was working in Lake Charles LA at Northup-Grummen and was introduced to the Thiobodeaux and Boudreaux jokes along with Lousinanna Boudian amoung other delectable treats.

I heard one Thiobodeaux and Bourdreaux joke which I can't repeat the punch line here ... First time, Boudreaux is going to catch nutria with Neutrasweet and came back with a boat full. Next day, he's going duck hunting with duct tape and has another boat load of ducks. I can't tell you what he was hunting for (or what he was using for bait) the next day, but Thiobodeaux decided he'd better go along.
 
Ran out of gas going down the hwy.I pulled over and about that time a bee flew into my car and asked me "whats wrong?" I told him that I ran out of gas...the bee said, I'll be right back". In no short time a whole swarm of bees flew up to my car and flew into my gas tank. A little time passed and the first bee flew up and said "try it now". I turned the engine over and ,sure enough , it started. I asked the bee "what did ya'll do?" and the bee replied..........................................ready for this?.....................wait for it................................................................................wait.........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................BP
 
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