Jokes and Politics

[Klaactu]

Jokes and politics.

What would make a great slogan to put on the side of a successful trash truck?

Business is picking up

What would you name an eating establishment that had pool tables and tall blond waitresses with long necks?

Barbi-cue

My political joke:

republ I CAN

democ RAT

[Klaactu]

A spoiled woman's husband forgot her birthday and was she mad. She decided to put him one the spot, and wanting a new car, she told him she better have something on the driveway waiting for her in the morning that could go from 0 to 200 in under 8 seconds. The husband told her ok. The next morning she looked at her driveway. There sat a medium sized beautifully wrapped box. Assuming is was the keys to her new car, she raced outside and tore open the box. Inside was a set of bathroom scales.

[FCSA football]

Not a joke. This is true. A company in the Victoria, Texas area has a lot of trucks driving around with the company name plastered on both sides and the back, “White Trash Services”.
No comment beyond that.........

[51eleven]

Not a joke. This is true. A company in the Victoria, Texas area has a lot of trucks driving around with the company name plastered on both sides and the back, “White Trash Services”.
No comment beyond that.........

How do they know whose trash they're picking up? White Trash only might be a limited market, they might need to diversify.

[FCSA football]

I don’t know but their web page say they are the Official Trash Service for the Industrial ISD.
You know, I didn’t just make this up. Google “White Trash Services, Victoria Texas”
Just reportin’ what I seen.........

[Klaactu]

That reminds me of the days when the Koffee Kup Kafe in Hico gained publicity when it was noticed that from a distance, all you could see on their lit sign was the big K's.

[Klaactu]

At a Summer Olympics, three politicians (a Republican, a Supreme court Justice, and a Democrat) agree to try to fool the guard at the performers gate and sneak in. The next day, up to the gate walks the Republican wearing a track suit and holding a silver frisbee. He says "Mike Pence, Discuss." and the guard tells him to enter. A few hours later, the Supreme Court member walks up to the gate wearing a track suit and holding a long broom handle he has painted dark gray. He says "Brett Kavanaugh, Javelin." and the guard lets him in. After a couple of hours, a lady wearing a torn and bloody dress is seen limping towards the gate. She has barbed wire wrapped around her arms and torso and she is holding a pair of plyers and a hammer. She struggles as she painfully arrives. She says, "Nancy Pelosi, fencing."

[Klaactu]

What has more brains than Soleimani?


The back seat of his vehicle.

[freeagent]

I got a serious etiquette question on the passing of the Iranian General.

When we blow an Islamofacist terrorist to smithereens like we did this guy, do you send sympathy cards to each of his wives or can you just send one that they can pass around among themselves?

Asking for a friend.

[Old Bearkat]

I got a serious etiquette question on the passing of the Iranian General.

When we blow an Islamofacist terrorist to smithereens like we did this guy, do you send sympathy cards to each of his wives or can you just send one that they can pass around among themselves?

Asking for a friend.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue
Blew you to smithereens
And your buddies too.

[Blue Bird]

...even Covid picked Trump over Biden!!!

[Old Bearkat]

...even Covid picked Trump over Biden!!!

Covid 19 tested positive for Trump 45.....

[freeagent]

Speaking of voting and politics, here's an old joke ... even got a big laugh out of our state rep.

Anyway, there was this terrible shipwreck and there were only three survivors. Richard Nixon, Lyndon Johnson and old Mayor Daley from Chicago. The three men quickly realized that there was only enough provisions on the life raft for only one to survive.

Being politicians, they realized the best way to determine the survivor was to have a campaign and election. So they went about the campaign and the election.

When it was time to count the votes, Nixon got 1. LBJ had 3. And Mayor Daley had 7.